Update

I have had a detox bath, anyone that has not had one I advise HAVE ONE NOW! There are many types, the best I have read up about are ginger baths, and epsom salt baths. I had neither, so I had a sea salt, bath salt and lavender oil bath, VERY HOT. Stay in it for 40mins, after about 15-20 you should really start to sweat, if not make it hotter. Your skin is like another liver, so it expels water and waste. Fomr sweating you can get rid of impurities and toxins through sweating. So I did, man I nearly fainted by the 15min mark, but stayed in with my will to please Ana, who would have tormented me had I left early. I really though I was going to pass out and drown lol, but hey any pain is worth it huh!

So after my bath I reweighed and guess what! I was 196.2!!! I lost a pound, and I'm not worried either as my pee was still clear so I am hydrated still. I was so so happy...until...

I BINGED! Urgh I'm such a fat pig! I had pitta, tomato, mustard and ham. That would have been fine until my stupid ed brain tells me...eat more, eat more...it's your last day, go on, eat more :( so I did. I had fries and scampi with tartare sauce, and a digestive biscuit. I could feel my stomach stretching over so much stupid food.

MIA TO THE RESCUE!!! She was so so kind! It came up practically automatically, i hardly had to try. It even looked like more than I ate! Oh thank you Mia, without you to be there when I fall how would I ever succeed? It was so easy! I felt so so much lighter after it, and all I wanted was water, It made me think, why on earth did I want food in the first place? It's my stupid brain that wants it, not my body! But I DON'T want it, I hate how ed plays tricks on me, making me do things I don't want to. All because I'm downstairs alone in the house, the kitchen next door. Knowing my parents won't see me eating, I don't like people seeing me eat anymore. Especially binge! I just had my nightime weigh, and i'm 197, same as this morning, so I've been lucky I suppose, even though I saw the 6's today :( I'm hoping I lose over night.

Took more lax, just to be cleaner for my fast, and will have a ginger and epsom salt bath tomorrow.

Hope you're all well beautiful butterflies xxx